How I learned to make a “cat taco.”

My oldest cat, Dominique, had a reoccurrence of health problem. So I took her to the vet this morning.

Dominique is the sweetest tempered being of any species that I have been blessed to have known.  She is a Tonkinese cat and like many of her breed has a calm demeanor, excellent social skills and enjoyment of human companionship. For instance, as I am typing the blog entry, she is sitting on my shoulder watching me type.

Tonkinese Cat

http://www.world4pets.com/catbreeds/tonkinese.jpg

Going to a vet’s office must be the a feline version of a trip to the Infernal Regions.

1. The cat, being used to roaming freely in the house, finds herself stuck in a carrier.
2. The cat has to endure a ride in a motor vehicle.
3. The poor cat has to sit the vet’s waiting room and watch, see and smell dogs in the same area.
4. The cat then is carried into the examining room, which probably has lots of strange smells in it.
5. Then the poor cat is grabbed by an attendant, weighed and has her temperature taken anally.
6. Then she is poked and by prodded by the vet.

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Dominique endured all of these things with equanimity and grace–and lots of TLC from me.

When the doctor asked for a blood sample, she also endured being taken away from me into some alien environment full of lots of other strange smells and was jabbed with a needle by the tech who returned smelling of alcohol. Yuck!

When she was returned to me, the vet indicated that he wanted her to receive twice daily doses of an oral medication. I asked the doctor if he could have the tech visit with me and give the first dose to Dominique so I could brush up on my technique. The doctor agreed.

When the tech returned, I sensed from Dominique’s non-verbal response that her reservoir of calm and good manners was about empty, so I wondered what was going to happen. The tech, who seemed to have a natural affinity for small animals, said that for more troublesome cats, he used one procedure. But for docile cats like Dominique he would use a more direct approach. I thought that he was making a mistake, but it would have been rude for me to tell him his business, so I said nothing.

The tech positions her on the table and asked me to hold onto her shoulders. No problem there! When he approached her mouth and almost got the syringe into it, Dominique’s claws came out and she slashed at him. Who could blame her?

The tech decided to use Plan B. He told me that they call it, making a “cat taco.”  He had me wrap her up in the small towel that I had lined her carrier with and then lift her up.  Wrapped up that way, it was heard to miss the visual resemblance to a taco.

The tech got the syringe into her unwilling mouth this time and squirted one ml. of the solution into it. Of course, she spat half of it out right away. So we went through the drill a second time, embarrassing the poor tech even more.

Once we got back home, Dominique seemed quite peppy and she ate heartily. Obviously she had gotten over her trauma.

This evening, my wife and I had no difficulty in administering round two of the medication. I suspect that we may have to hunt her down for the next six days before we can give her medication. But, she won’t claw us, probably because we don’t do all of those other nasty things to her.

The moral of the story is that after you have abused someone a number of times, it is best to let them calm down before attempting to inflict any further indignities upon them–particularly if your victim has the means and will to resist. Its a shame that the Powers That Be inside the Beltway haven’t figured this out yet.